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Nips and Tucks
by Katacha Diaz It was a typical, rainy Seattle day in spring 1982. My husband’s brother and wife were honeymooning in the Pacific Northwest. This was Tania María’s first trip to the United States, so I was roped into accompanying her to one of the Emerald City’s premier shopping malls. Truth be told, shopping was one of my least favorite activities. Rico’s petite and vivacious Brazilian wife was clearly a woman on a mission – a high-end shopping spree for top of the line cosmetics and pricey perfumes, preferably French, she purred seductively in her Portuguese accent. Walking in 5-inch stilettos like a catwalk fashion model, Tania María gracefully sashays from counter to counter daintily squirting perfume on her wrists. Lusting after newly discovered French scents that are not available back home in Brazil, my sister-in-law lines up a rather impressive collection of perfumes she fancies and selects four to purchase. “Just bring a case of Chivas,” she said, happily trying on and purchasing a pair of giant Chanel sunglasses, a favorite and must-have item for the women in her social circle, like the Manolo Blahnik sexy stiletto strappy sandals she was wearing on our shopping adventure. When she spots the Chanel cosmetics counter a few feet away, it was an instant magnet and she makes a beeline for a complimentary makeover. I follow behind carrying shopping bags entrusted to my care for “safekeeping.” The cosmetologist expertly applies skin care creams, face make-up, lipstick and mascara, while a sales associate stands by jotting down my sister-in-law’s order and gathering the growing collection of items to be purchased. After Tania María settles splurge-worthy luxury beauty products bill, I suggest refreshment break at a trendy bistro with outdoor and indoor seating ideal for people watching. Earlier my sister-in-law had mentioned something about bringing a case of scotch but didn’t elaborate; I was at a loss and somewhat curious. “Why scotch?” I asked. And then, to my surprise, I discovered that Chivas Regal 18-Year Scotch was not only the coveted libation of Brazil’s aristocratic elites and the nouveau riche; it was also used to barter for goods and services, including nips and tucks with her family’s favorite plastic surgeon and a close relative. In 1982 I was thirty-six years old and finishing up graduate school at the University of Washington. Several years earlier I had undergone major surgery, a life-altering event, so I was not a good candidate for cosmetic enhancement surgical procedures involving the end of a scalpel. Tania María was also in her mid-30s, and proudly shared that she was a veteran of multiple cosmetic improvement surgeries, including the famed Brazilian butt lift, liposuction, and breast implants. In Brazil, she explained, taking a sip of her caffé latte, plastic surgery was a status symbol and something to brag about. It was a woman’s job to look beautiful because Brazilian men like beautiful women, so plastic surgery was part of a woman’s beauty régime to look beautiful. Nowadays, she said, smiling, many pre-nuptial agreements in her social circle include an extra allowance clause to cover a leading board-certified aesthetic plastic surgeon’s fees for the wife’s periodic nips and tucks. My tête-à- tête with Tania María was not only informative, but also confirms that Brazil was still a sexist country. Obsessive tinkering was part of their culture and a lucrative industry supported by Brazilian women consumers. Afterwards my sister-in-law and I took the escalator up to the second floor to visit a popular designer shop. Tania María’s eyes fell on a mannequin dressed in lavish turquoise blue haute couture halter gown with a plunging neckline. “Très chic! Why don’t you try it on?” I suggested. “Oh, no,” my sister-in-law told me in a whisper, pointing at her breasts. “My implants are no longer fashionable. Have you seen the latest models in Vogue and Bazaar?” I shook my head. Tania María smiled, “Flat chest.” She was seriously contemplating her fourth cosmetic enhancement procedure – replacing breast implants with trendy smaller ones. Although I was curious, I did not ask if she’d consulted with my brother-in-law on the breast reduction matter, or if they had a pre-nuptial agreement in place with an allowance for nips and tucks with her family’s plastic surgeon. In keeping with the plastic surgery theme, Tania María brings up a family visit to Brazil that in reality was still years away. She chats enthusiastically and provides a breakdown of cosmetic enhancement procedures her plastic surgeon cousin performs – face-lifts, liposuction, nose or ears job, Botox, butt implants, and breast implants or lifts. The nips and tucks deal was all-inclusive – private hospital, post-op medical care, 30-day convalescence stay at a posh country club with daily maid service, personal chef, and masseuse was included. And a case of Chivas seals the deal! There’s a first time for everything. Nips and tucks with a leading board-certified aesthetic plastic surgeon in a private hospital in Belém, located near the mouth of the Amazon River, was something to ponder. Convalescing at a posh country club was certainly inviting and the perfect exotic get-away from rainy Seattle days and the rigors of academia. In my mind’s eye I visualize casual tropical setting with lush gardens and swaying palm trees, the carefree sounds of bossa nova and samba jazz tunes lingering in the air, leisurely siestas in cozy hammock, and tropical mango and passion fruit rum cocktail with a colorful little umbrella propped on the side of an elegant tall glass. It’s lunchtime. We make our way to a nearby elegant restaurant that offers fine dining and a relaxing atmosphere to enjoy a pre-lunch cocktail and a leisurely Latin-style lunch with our husbands. When we entered the restaurant, Rico’s eyes fell on our shopping bags. “How did it go?” he asked. “Mission accomplished!” I said, handing over his new bride’s collection of shopping bags that she’d entrusted to my care. “Tania María made a wonderful contribution to the local economy!” Later that afternoon, on the drive back to our student apartment, I asked my husband to stop at the nearest liquor store. He scratched his head and looked puzzled. “I need to place an order for a case of Chivas Regal 18-Year Scotch,” I announced. “Are you kidding?” he said. “We don’t drink scotch.” “It’s for nips and tucks,” I said, laughing. |
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